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July 31, 2007

Comments

m. swaim

Chick Publications' patron saint!

Clayton Barnett

A friend of mine, and a priest, told me this story: while Jesus was a baby in the manger, he looks to his left and sees an ox; he looks to his right and sees an ass. Then he turns his eyes Heaven-wards and says, "Truly, Father, I am in the Society of Jesus!"

Other priests to whom I tell that like it; Jesuits... not so much.

Skygor

So a Jesuit and a Dominican walk into a bar...

(Just had to say that first!)

bill912

...and the Dominican says: "I asked my superior if it was okay to smoke a cigar while I say the Office, and he chastised me."

The Jesuit says: "Really, I asked my superior if it was okay to meditate while I smoke a cigar, and he praised me."

JoAnna

...a Dominican, a Franciscan, and a Jesuit walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this, a joke?"

Tony

A man walks up to a Jesuit and a Franciscan and asks them: "Fathers, how many novenas do I have to say to get a Mercedes Benz?"

The Franciscan asks: "What's a Mercedes Benz?"

The Jesuit asks: "What's a novena?"

Ed Peters

Great line, Jimmy.

Megan Elizabeth

St. Ignatius of Loyola is one of my favorite saints, along with St. Francis Xavier. I have heard of good Jesuits and bad Jesuits. Just like I've heard of good Marianists and bad Marianists, good diocesan priests and bad diocesan priests, etc.

That said, here's a funny joke:

A parish priest has a group of other priests visiting his church. Some are Benedictines, some Franciscans, some Dominicans, and some Jesuits.

As they are about to say the Office, the lights go out.

The Benedictines recite their office from memory.

The Franciscans start looking for candles.

The Domincans begin discussing the nature of light.

The Jesuits speculate as to whether the power failure exempts them from the obligation to say the Office.

The parish priest gets up and changes the lightbulb.

Esau

Great, it's "Fr. Mitch Pacwa" day!

Jesuit John

A Jesuit, a Dominican and a Franciscan are stuck playing golf behind a group of blind golfers. While they wait, the Franciscan breaks into song about God siding with the poor, lame and blind. The Dominican starts taking notes for his next homily on how God can transcend the senses. The Jesuit yells out "Hey! Can't you blind fellows play golf at night and leave the course to us during the day?"

Esau

This is sad.

So far, I've seen people mentioning the Dominicans, the Franciscans, the Jesuits and even the Benedictines; but whatever happened to the Augustinians?

It's bad enough St. Anthony, who originally was an Augustinian, was lost to the Franciscans!

Poor Augustinians!

Maureen

Didn't the Augustinians also bring us Martin Luther?

*EG*

Uncle Joe

Of all the religious orders, the Jesuits have had the greatest and best influence on me. Thanks be to God and St Ignatius.

Thanks for the jokes too. Perhaps it's my limited upbringing, but in all the jokes I can remember, where the religious order is important, Jesuits are the butt/punchline. Any theories?

Jerry

Uncle Joe:

The Jesuits are one of the largest orders, and still in many ways the most influential, so there is a lot of friction, especially since they often intruded on the "turf" of older orders (e.g., the Jesuits becoming preeminent in Catholic education, no doubt stepping on the sandals of the Dominicans and Benedictines on the way). There is an intensity to the Jesuit ethos that can lead to a nasty sort of elitism (both perceived and real) that I think may often grate on other orders' nerves as well.

I think that intensity dovetails well with Mr. Akin's statement on Jesuits: when they're good, they're great (my confirmation saint is Ignatius), but that same authority and charism can cause terrible damage when a Jesuit flies off the handle, to say nothing of when an entire Province or Jesuit college or university goes down the tubes.

That's how I've seen it; I'm summarizing a very long, complicated story, but it seems to hold some water.

Ed Peters

Meagn, terrific joke. Thx!

That said, Jimmy's line is rather more than "Well, there's good and bad in every group." The Jesuits are not usual in that regard. They just aren't. For whatever reason, they just aren't.

Margaret

As to the matter of how successful the Jesuits have been versus the Dominicans: the Jesuits were formed to counter the Protestant (de)Formation, while the Dominicans arose in response to the Albigensian heresy.

So, I ask you-- when's the last time you met an Albigensian?!?? :-)

bill bannon

I had the Jesuits for prep school and college. Throughout history they have produced both strict members (Arthur Vermeesch...leading moral theologian in the early 20th century who was so strict that he opposed natural family planning in the end as it became more accurate and he lost out on that issue because he followed the Augustinian view of asking for the debt as venial sin).... and the Jesuits could be far from strict with some in the Chinese ancestral rites controversy seeing well before Rome ( which later admitted them to be correct) that idolatry was not involved but rather veneration for ancestors. And thirdly they can be non strict in the bad sense of laxism....but so were many of John Paul's appointees like Cardinal Law and Cardinal Groer who talked the talk but did not walk the walk...and no one jokes about diocesan clergy because of them. Somehow the Jesuits get the lax label even though historically, that is only a slice of their history. We lost China for centuries because a Pope thought them incorrect and only later did another Pope think them prescient on the very same issue.

BobCatholic

Can you imagine Fr. Mitch Pacwa and what he goes through? He gets Jesuit jokes from the Catholics, and polish jokes from the secular world. The cool thing is he can probably say both in multiple languages. :P

I wonder how to say "A Jesuit, a Dominican and a Franciscan walk into a bar" I know who to ask :)

Mary

Dearest Lord, teach me to be generous. Teach me to serve you as you deserve; to give and not to count the cost; to fight, and not to heed the wounds; to labor, and not to seek to rest; to give of myself and not to ask for reward, except the reward of knowing that I am doing your will.

Megan Elizabeth

Ed,

I wasn't trying to say that the Jesuits are exactly like any other order. They are unique, and I very much agree with Jimmy's assesment. I just get mad at the attitude that some people (not trying to accuse anyone here) seem to have that says a) all Jesuits are heretics, and b) all heretics are Jesuits. I don't know too many Jesuits so I can't refute a) based on personal knowledge (Father Pacwa could be an abberation, after all) but I can definitely refute b) from things I've seen at a parish level. They might never make national news or even the diocesan newspaper, but there have been plenty of times in my own experience when lukewarm or downright heretical priests were never corrected, while passionate orthodox ones were told to tone it down. Jesuits are not responsible for everything that's wrong with the Church.

Uncle Joe

A collection of Jesuit jokes collected by Fr Felix Just SJ.
He explains: Not all of these jokes are complimentary about us, but hopefully we can laugh at our own faults and foibles, not just those of others!

Proof that Jesuits are a cut above the rest :)

BTW check out the excellent biblical and Lectionary resources on his website - follow link at the very bottom of the jokes page.

Mark

I went to a Jesuit High School.

The education was good but not great.

Some nice people.

The religious studies was not even Christian.

The spiritual devotion side was non existent.

Some good social service stuff.

No real Catholicism on the whole.
Maybe a couple good lay people or priests.
Some real serious errors.

Not the Jesuits you read about.

Jerry

"So, I ask you-- when's the last time you met an Albigensian?!?? :-)"


Well, I could also point out that this may be in large part due to the Albigensian Crusade (source of the "Kill them all, let God sort them out") slaughtering the Albigensians. ;)

Esau

Well, I could also point out that this may be in large part due to the Albigensian Crusade (source of the "Kill them all, let God sort them out") slaughtering the Albigensians. ;)


Jerry,
Mary had already in the past shown this to be untrue.

Esau

Today, Tuesday, August 1st, is Redemptorist Day!

At any rate, is anybody acquainted with the below facts?

Given the following, does this mean in a weird way, St. St Alphonsus Liguori is sort of like the Patron Saint for Law School rejects/drop-outs?


Link:
St Alphonsus Liguori (1696 - 1787)

Excerpt:
He was a Neapolitan lawyer who lost a court case in a spectacular fashion, when it turned out that a key document in his case had been misinterpreted by him and in fact proved his opponent’s case instead. He immediately left the law and studied for the priesthood. But God is not proud, and accepts people even on the rebound: Alphonsus became a priest.

After his retirement Alphonsus had to try to make peace within the congregation. Unfortunately his old failing returned and he signed a new Constitution for the Redemptorists without reading it properly (though, to be fair to him, he was 80 and in poor health at the time).

Some Day

So a Jesuit and a Dominican walk into a bar...

(Just had to say that first!)

Posted by: Skygor | Jul 31, 2007 7:12:46 AM

...and the Dominican says: "I asked my superior if it was okay to smoke a cigar while I say the Office, and he chastised me."

The Jesuit says: "Really, I asked my superior if it was okay to meditate while I smoke a cigar, and he praised me."

That is not how I've heard it.

It goes like this:
The Superior General of the Franciscans going to the Vatican to speak to the Pope and he sees the Superior Gen. of the Jesuits.
They greet each other...
And the Jesuit asks, "Well what are you here for? I'm here to see if my priests can smoke and pray the Office at the same time."
-"Curiously, I'm here for the same thing."
-"We can't go in together though. it might look bad go ahead in front of me."
-"No, you were here first, and we are of the same rank"
-"I insist, your order is older"
-Fine Thank you"

So the SG of the Franciscans goes in, and comes out.

-"I had no luck."
-"What did you say?"
-"Holy Father, my friars are very much in to smoking, so when they pray the Office they can't stand it and have to go out to smoke, so while they pray the Office can they smoke? He said no and dismissed me with a stern face."
-"Let me give it a try"

So the Jesuit goes in and out with the same face.

-"Did he let you?"
-"Yes."
-"No! what did you say?"
-"The same thing you said, though I said it a bit different at the end. Instead of permission to smoke while we pray, I asked if while we smoke can way pray.
He applauded the idea."

Some Day

Oh and yes.

Jesuits are the worst thing nowadays.
Since they reopened them they got really mixed up with masons.

If you read up on all the communist revolutions and leftist governments, you will always see a Jesuit.

Most people I know who studied under the Jesuits say that they left the school more athiest then when they came in.

But Ignacian logic is stupendous.

St. Ignatius is truly a phenomenal saint.

And hopefuly I too as well hope to see a new order conquer St. Francis Xavier's dream of China.
I was born on his memorial.
I love conquering saints!


Oh and Esau, don't ruin the fun.

I am pretty sure they said that and it is a phenomenal approach to such a situation.

Esau

Jesuits are the worst thing nowadays.
Since they reopened them they got really mixed up with masons.

So, by this, are you saying Fr. Mitch Pacwa is a mason?

Some Day

No.
I don't know much about him.
But I know he is really good friends with people I know you guys would really dislike.
Really.

Esau

I don't know much about him.

Some Day:
You visited the Shrine didn't you?


But I know he is really good friends with people I know you guys would really dislike.

And just who are these friends of Fr. Pacwa that we wouldn't like?

Some Day

I have.
On several occasions.
I know people there.

And the friends are some people I don't think it would be wise for me to even say I know who they are.
Much less say that I know them pretty well.

Esau

And the friends are some people I don't think it would be wise for me to even say I know who they are.

But why wouldn't we, the folks here, dislike them?

Esau

I meant, why wouldn't we like them?

Are they some sort of secret society of evil people?

Some Day

No.
To say the least, they are rad trads who go far worst than the affirmations John makes around here (no mean to take a shot at you John. It is to give an idea)

I'll bet if you knew their name and mentioned it to your parish priest he would either ignore it totally or speak horors.

Esau

But Fr. Pacwa is a Charismatic.

I doubt that he would hold to such Rad Trad opinions.

Some Day

As I said, I don't know much about him.
But I know he is friends with them.
I don't know if it is either he is charismatic or fakes it or those people slipped or are playing stupid.

Plus his friends look excellent on the outside.
But inside it is a horrible mess.

Jarnor23

You know, people can be friends with people they totally don't see eye to eye with on a matter. Actually, that's how I became Catholic. :)

Some Day

In the vestments I saw Fr.Pacwa in, I would never have guessed he was a charismatic.


"Friends" needs careful use of.
I don't make friends with people who are against the Church or are immoral.
Yet I still treat them with courtesy and respect.

Is that what you mean by "friends" because any other way seens a bit relativist.

Jarnor23

Some Day, some day you're going to figure out that you have to eat with tax collectors to save their souls. I just hope that's before you become a priest if you're still believing you have a vocation to it.

Esau

Some Day, some day you're going to figure out that you have to eat with tax collectors to save their souls.


Yeah!

Even Jarnor23 has Prostitutes for friends! ;^)

Sorry, bad joke, bad form as well.

Jarnor23

Damn, Esau, who's been talking? My PR representative should be by shortly to discuss this. He's the albino in a monk's garb. ;)

Seriously though, I think we've all got that friend whose sexual life isn't that far from it. Prayer and living a good example are key, and will be the primary way of converting hearts. As is honesty should they, say, ask what you think of their latest escapades.

Esau

Damn, Esau, who's been talking?

Jarnor23,

Whoa!

You mean JoAnna actually lets you mess around with Prostitutes? ;^)

(I know, bad form yet again! Hehehhe!)


Some Day,

I believe Jarnor23 is correct to the extent that even Jesus had tax collectors and prostitutes for friends.

Jarnor23

Thanks, Esau, you're a good man, no matter what they all say behind your back. ;)

Some Day

I actually have to make a retraction.
While Fr. Pacwa has met in serious internal meeting these people, I was refering to the other priest, Fr. Trigilio.

My bad.

And by the way, don't assume I don't.

Apostolate is different from choice friends and environments.
I honestly don't mean to brag, I just want to show a distinction.

Since I was young kid I remember helping from the dying of AIDS (and all the prosaic things that come with it) to help forming 8 year olds in a life of virtue, combativity and above all devotion to Our Lady.

I've seen it all.
But I chose not to do it all.

There is a difference.
Our Lord helped those in lost ways, yet He never lost His way to find those who are lost.

There are means and ways.

Jarnor23

Good, good. I'm no more advocating being a prostitute to help prostitutes than one would have to have AIDS to help someone who has it. We have to remember though that we are called to love and show mercy, even to those in most need of His mercy. I know I'm glad He has that kind of mercy on me, as I need it.

Spot marks the X

...and the child Jesus was visited by three wise men: A Franciscan, a Dominican and a Jesuit. The Franciscan approached Joseph and Mary with a beautiful, handmade creche. The Dominican approached the Holy Family with a Rosary. The Jesuit pulled Joseph aside and asked, "so have you thought about the boy's education?"

As one who has gone through eight years of Jesuit education and briefly discerned with the order, I can say that the Jesuit running this Web site is not an anomoly. To borrow a quote from B16 on the church, the Society "Is Alive!"

The order, moreso than most, is a microcosim of the church. And as the church as a whole, especially us JPIIers, returns to the truth, so does the Society. Ignatius built into the Society a "way of proceeding"; a flexibility that allows, indeed, demands that it adapt to the times to most effectively preach the Gospel. While this flexibility means it suffered greatly amid the confusion and turmoil after Vatican II, it will also allow the order to thrive as others wilt away.

The Jesuits are one of the only (if not only) order to take an extra vow of OBEDIENCE TO THE POPE...this practically applies not to the everyday doings of individual Jesuits, but to the overall direction of the order. Indeed, John Paul II may have saved the Society by rejecting its choice for Father General in the early 80s. The current Fr. General Kolvenbach has announced plans to step down, and a general congregation is planned for, I believe, next year. This will determine the next steps the order takes.

Through the intercession of the Blessed Mother and St. Ignatius of Loyola, may the Society of Jesus restore itself to its rightful place in the Church, among Her most fervent propagators of the faith.

A.M.D.G.

You need a lot of dead jesuits and new ones to take over for that to happen

HONA DIVINE

GOODDAY BRETHREN IT IS WITH GREAT HAPPYNESS WRITING TO THE JESUIT CONGREGATION THAT YOU PEOPLE ARE DOING A WODERFUL WORK IN THE WORLD AND I PRAY GOD TO GIVE YOU PEOPLE GRACE TO KEEP ON THIS WAY THANKS.

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