April 25, 2008
One Compliment Too Many
(Jimmy Akin)
I want to thank Mark Shea both for calling my attention to a set of loony criticisms being made against me and for defending me against said loony criticisms.
Here's a key excerpt from Mark's blog:
One reader, for instance, prophesies (on the basis of nothing whatsoever) Jimmy Akin's looming apostasy. Why? Because Gerry Matatics has apostatized into nutty sedevacantism and, if you've seen one convert, you've seen 'em all:
I'd bet you dollars to doughnuts that if Benedict lasts another decade or is succeeded by a like minded pope, some of the lay apologists that are trashing Gerry now will be jumping ship themselves.
There's NO WAY the Jimmy Aikens are going to sit by while Rome says things like: "pro multis means for the many", "the Mass of Pius V was never abrogated", "Protestant Churches are not true Churches."
Jimmy's accuser has a far higher regard for his own mind reading powers than the actual record warrants. But when you are engaged against an enemy of the faith as slippery as a convert, accuracy is of secondary importance. So you can just sling such prophesies, even when they are contradicted by known facts and ignore requests to document, for instance, a single place where Jimmy has ever dissented from the Church's teaching on our relationship with Protestant ecclesial bodies. The main thing to remember is that converts aren't *really* Catholic.
Now, I'll be the first to concede that the critic has a point that in the cases of some converts, the conversion hasn't "stuck." In other cases, it hasn't proceeded far enough, and the convert has retained undue elements from his prior religious affiliation. (Just as somemany cradle Catholics leave Catholicism or adopt false elements of other religious traditions. Both converts and non-converts have free will, and many are willing to use it inappropriately.)
I can't speak for such converts. In my case I have tried to rigorously assimilate the Catholic spirit. My religious reading matter consists principally of official Church documents, the Bible, the Church Fathers, and Catholic authors who are almost wholly from pre-Vatican II days.
I really don't read much, if any, "convert lit." While it's a historical fact that I am a convert, I don't walk around every day thinking "I'm a convert." That's not what is central to my identity. I think of myself as a Catholic, and days can go by where I don't even think about my conversion.
I certainly don't make a point of it, except on those rare occasions when someone asks be to tell my conversion story. And I daresay that most people who hear me on the radio or read my writings don't even know that I'm a convert until it's pointed out to them.
I don't wear my conversion on my sleeve, because I don't think it's anything to be particularly proud of. It is a miracle of God's grace, and the credit for that goes to him, not me. On my part, I just want to be a faithful Catholic now that I am one.
So when I read about the critic's linking me to Gerry Matatics, I just rolled my eyes. Not all converts to the Catholic faith are cut from cloth made of the same unstable molecules as Gerry Matatics. Such cloth may be an important asset for Mr. Fantastic and the Fantastic Four, but there are converts and then there are converts.
I was particularly struck by the critic making claims about me that are just loony and that in no way reflect my views.
I mean, I believe that "pro multis means for the many", I believe that "the Mass of Pius V was never abrogated" (certainly if you include the Missal of 1962 as an expression of it), and I believe that "Protestant Churches are not true churches" because they lack validly ordained bishops. The technically correct terminology for them is "ecclesial communities," which is the language used for them in various Church documents.
So I was very pleased to see Mark rebutting these claims and citing posts on my own blog in refutation of them.
A big CHT to Mark!
But he did give me one compliment too many. In response to the critic's claim that I had changed my view on the translation of pro multis after Cardinal Arinze wrote a letter clarifying its translation in the liturgy, Mark writes:
So: according to my reader, Jimmy Akin held a private opinion but altered it when it seemed to him that the Magisterium was against him. Wow! That *is* evil! See how converts just blend in with Real Catholics[TM] by submitting their judgment to the teachers of the Church? They're like chameleons!
While I wish to be quite submissive to the authoritative teaching of the Magisterium, I can't claim that I changed a private opinion in this case.
Somehow in rad trad circles I got the reputation of changing my mind on the translation of pro multis, when in reality I always supported a literal translation of it like "for many."
Why?
Because I'm a student of languages, because I prefer literal translations to dynamic ones, and because that's what the literal translation of pro multis just is.
I've certainly made no secret of my disapproval of all kinds of squishy translations--even "official" ones--of Bible verses, Church documents, or liturgical texts. This one is no different. I prefer and always have preferred a literal translation of the original text.
Thus upon my first hearing of the letter from Cardinal Arinze dealing with the subject, I wrote THIS:
Hallelujah!
This is something I've really been hoping and praying for. I've even thought about writing Cardinal Arinze and imploring him to do this, because the release of the new translation of the Mass is the perfect opportunity to do this, and with B16 in office, the pope would have the sensitivity to the issue to realize how much benefit this change would be.
I was therefore DEE-lighted when a reader e-mailed this story from Catholic World News:
Pro multis means "for many," Vatican rules
[SNIP]
The only reason that there has been any confusion regarding my view of the translation of pro multis is that some rad trads have been running around babbling that the translation of pro multis as "for all" renders the consecration of the Eucharist invalid.
It doesn't.
And so, as an author writing on liturgical subjects, I've made exactly the same points that Cardinal Arinze makes in section 2 of his LETTER:
2. There is no doubt whatsoever regarding the validity of Masses celebrated with the use of a duly approved formula containing a formula equivalent to "for all", as the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith has already declared (cf. Sacra Congregatio pro Doctrina Fidei, Declaratio de sensu tribuendo adprobationi versionum formularum sacramentalium, 25 Ianuarii 1974, AAS 66 [1974], 661). Indeed, the formula "for all" would undoubtedly correspond to a correct interpretation of the Lord's intention expressed in the text. It is a dogma of faith that Christ died on the Cross for all men and women (cf. John 11:52; 2 Corinthians 5,14-15; Titus 2,11; 1 John 2,2).
Yet for some reason, certain rad trads have represented me as holding a different interpretation of the matter than Cardinal Arinze and then changing it when his letter came out.
This is pure, unadulterated horse leavings.
I have always held that pro multis is best represented with a literal translation, and devoutly wished that the Church would change the approved English translation to reflect this, while also holding the points that Cardinal Arinze makes above.
So before everyone congratulates me on being willing to submit my judgment to that of the Church on this point, allow me to note that this is one compliment too many. I've always held the views I do on this subject and was delighted to see the Church endorse them.
I also advise critics to read my writings more carefully next time, and not to trust unreliable sources.
(P.S. Also thanks to Mark for spelling my last name right.)
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (39)
December 06, 2007
Driven to Pray
(Tim Jones)
Hey, Tim Jones, here.
From my Blog - Old World Swine;
I'm not a morning person. I'm really not. Waking up for me most days is something like coming out of anesthesia after surgery. This has sometimes made me feel like a slacker when I hear others talking about how they are up at 4:00 am every day for prayer, Bible reading and a brisk walk, while I am drooling into my pillow.
I have tried doing my personal prayer time first thing in the morning as soon as my feet hit the floor, but the main feature of the exercise turned out to be simply the fight to keep my eyelids from dropping. It was a constant, very physical struggle against sleep. So, eventually I quit worrying about praying like other people and started to look for ways I could pray when I was actually fully conscious.
One way that I have done this is to pray in the car. Normally, I spend a couple of hours a day driving, and instead of listening to a CD or the radio (the stone-age kind... just AM and FM, so choices are limited) I'll sometimes pray, usually the Rosary. Of course, traffic doesn't always cooperate and I'm often interrupted. I don't know if it's Christmas shopping traffic or what, but the freeway has been a bit more of a white-knuckle experience, lately. It's also kind of spiritually deflating to hear yourself say "...Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in - WHAT ARE YOU DOING??!! MERGE!! I'M TRYING TO LET YOU IN!!!!" (this really happened). Talk about heading back to the old spiritual drawing board...
Lately I have been doing my private prayer mostly at night, when everyone else has gone to bed. I still make some brief prayers through the day, including a morning offering, but for more considered meditation, I'm finding the late evening works well for me. As a family man, it also has a very fitting Watchman on the Walls sort of feel to it. This schedule means that instead of catching a late night classic movie - by myself - (which I love), I have to turn off the Idiot Box. I'm thinking this can't help but make me more human while also increasing IQ points. A double whammy of sanity.
The point is that there is no BEST time to pray. What works for some may not work for you. The goal should always be to move closer and closer to praying continually, and through this to move closer and closer to Christ.
What works for you?
Posted by Tim Jones in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (51)
April 25, 2007
On Losing My Speedo...
(Tim Jones)
My car is a wonder of modern American disposable engineering. A cheap compact with no frills and over 140 thousand miles, it astounds and delights me every time the engine cranks over (I am part Scot).
Lately, in addition to various other mysterious signs of aging, the speedometer just stops working at random. Mostly it works, but it can cut out at any time.
Now, when this happens, I noticed that I do one of two things; I either drive whatever speed "feels right", or I (consciously or un-) begin to adjust my speed to fit in with local traffic. This being the second car that I have been blessed to own having this defect, it struck me that A) maybe it was no accident, B) that a speedometer is an apt analogy to the human conscience, and C) that it was something out of which I could probably squeeze a blog post.
Of course, there may be many of you suggesting that D) maybe I should get the stupid car fixed, but given the actual value of the car, and the cost of pulling the dashboard and trying to find the problem (I have serviced my own car, like, twice in the last decade-and-a-half), it's nearly prohibitive. It's not really dangerous... just an irritation. Besides, I can often fix it by pounding on the dash just right... but I do plan to have it fixed as soon as possible.
But back to the conscience metaphor... The conscience (like the speedometer) is an internal guide that tells us how we're doing. We are given external guides (like road signs and Revelation) against which we can pretty reliably measure how well we are keeping The Law. But our consciences are not infallible. Sometimes they are defective. In a few instances, maybe they just never worked right at all. In the case of a defective conscience, a person will naturally tend to do one of two things... either they will do whatever "feels right" (whatever they want), or they will conform to the pressures of their immediate society.
We really need the external law, too (the road signs, Church teaching), or the reading on the speedometer becomes nearly meaningless. Following your conscience does NOT mean just doing whatever "feels right". The conscience is made to conform to an authoritative standard. If a policeman tickets you for driving 75 when your speedometer was reading only 62, there is no appealing to the defective instrument... the cop wins. If the church tells you that fornication is a sin, you have no defense in noting that, personally, you have no big problem with it. Your speedo is out of whack. Period. You are bound by your conscience, but your conscience is bound by The Law.
A defective conscience can - and should be - fixed.
Thing is, though, that I have received a few minor traffic tickets in my life, and in none of these instances was I driving a car with a bad speedo. The problem was, I had been ignoring a perfectly functioning speedo. I'd lay odds that this is the case in the vast majority of speeding violations. People just aren't paying attention... they are driving whatever speed they like, or they are going with the flow, or their mind is elsewhere, they are distracted.
For most of us, the conscience is working fine (or close enough), but we often ignore it. We can develop the habit of ignoring it.
One last thought... when you drive according to the traffic laws as faithfully as you can, you become like a living, moving representation - a personification of the law - to other drivers. You're the living law, just as we are all meant to be a living Catechism for those around us. That doesn't mean you won't be honked at... just try to avoid the fast lane.
That's it. Just something I pulled from random mental notes from a busy week. Tawk amongst ya-selves... got any good car stories?
Posted by Tim Jones in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (252)
March 19, 2007
Allison's New Heart
(Tim Jones)
My niece, Allison, has a new heart, as of last Tuesday! Many thanks to all for your prayers. Just for grins, I have posted a picture of her, pre-transplant, with Ace Young, from last season's American Idol show. He came by Denver Children's Hospital just to see her. Nice guy.
Since I posted a link to Allison's Web Page previously, I have refrained from posting on her progress for a couple of reasons;
1) The news of her recovery changes daily, and I only want to hit highlights as they come. I am by nature optimistic, and didn't want to post about every little bump in the road.
2) I didn't want events in my personal life to even BEGIN to dominate Jimmy's blog, even in the short term.
In short, Allison is doing well. The surgery itself went as well as could be expected. Such procedures now take between 6-8 hours, and her's was typical. there was scar tissue to deal with, and for that reason there was some increased post-operative bleeding that was not unexpected. One significant fact; Allison's blood oxygen levels, post-op, have been normal for the first time in her life! So her new heart is doing it's thing.
There have been some additional issues, but overall, Allison is recovering nicely. If you would like to keep up with her day-to-day progress, her webpage is updated fairly often by my brother, the radio genius. He's not only a great husband and father, but he can build a radio station for you from the ground up, and in addition is the best DJ and sports announcer I have ever heard.
Praise God for his healing mercy.
Posted by Tim Jones in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (13)
March 13, 2007
Allison Update
(Tim Jones)
Tim Jones, here. My niece, Allison, about whom I posted recently, has just headed into surgery to receive a heart transplant.
Your prayers are coveted by her family.
This news will not be reflected on her web page for some time, probably, but here it is for those who might like to find out a little more about her.
Humble thanks to all in advance.
Posted by Tim Jones in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (12)
March 07, 2007
Model Citizens
(Tim Jones)
Hey, Tim Jones, here.
I had the pleasure, lately, of spending a little time with some family who came to visit us from Germany, including a young nephew. I was looking after him for a few hours, and in my increasingly desperate quest to keep his active mind occupied, I discovered that he was interested in model building.
In paroxysms of geeky rapture, I dug out from our junk room a collection of dusty model projects, in various stages of completion. I had begun them with my son, and had worked on them mostly during holiday breaks, but found that he was not such a big fan of model building... at least not the patient assembling, painting, and following directions part. His participation in the actual building process quickly settled into a routine of checking in every half-hour or so to see how things were progressing.
Because I was partly motivated by dreams of bonding with my son over the smell of model cement and enamel paint, I put the projects aside, time being at something of a premium for me.
Now, in my five-year-old nephew, I saw another potential victim model-building buddy on whom I could hang my pathetic hopes with whom I could share my enthusiasm.
In the end, he did help me glue a couple of pieces, but the most fun was just watching his obvious fascination with the idea of models, and with the finished products.
While he was here, I managed to complete one project (the X-1) and get started on another that had been in mothballs for years (the U.S. Moon Shot series). I hope to complete a model of every aircraft or spacecraft featured in the movie The Right Stuff, which is one of our family's favorite films. Both my son and I are aviation buffs. His childhood hero was Chuck Yeager. We have a lot of happy memories tied up in these particular models.
Getting back into my model building was a great deal of fun, brought back some memories for my son and me, and made me feel like a kid again. It also got me to wondering what exactly was the appeal of spending so many precious hours, so much money and frustration on some plastic reproductions that could much more simply be bought on E-bay, or some such.
It occurred to me that in the act of building the models, one gets to know the subject much more thoroughly than before, and becomes more appreciative of the aspects of the project that the builder found attractive to begin with. It also struck me that my admiration for the people involved in the history of these machines - Chuck Yeager, Alan Shepard, John Glenn, all the the Mercury Seven and the Apollo astronauts - was analogous to the way Catholics take the saints as role models... with love and respect for the attributes that made them saints (and that helped them shape history) while remembering that they are human beings. We don't need to approve of every aspect of a saint's (or a hero's) personality in order to give proper recognition to those traits that made them superlative examples from whom we can take inspiration.
Having these models around brings to mind the courage, tenacity and brilliance of the men associated with them, just as having images of the saints around helps us to remember the heroes of the faith who came before us. Of course, for Catholics, the Communion of Saints carries the additional dimension of family affection. The saints are our kin. We can call on them for prayers and help, in addition to finding inspiration from their example. Sort of a big spiritual two-fer. In addition, we will one day get to meet the saints in heaven, if we persevere.
I certainly hope to meet these astronauts and pilots in heaven, too. It would be a shame, after spending so much time exploring the heavens, for any of them to miss out on the real thing.
Posted by Tim Jones in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (12)
February 14, 2007
Prayers for Allison
(Tim Jones)
I don't normally use JA.O as a bulletin board for prayer requests. There are other avenues for that, and Jimmy's blog is really about apologetics more than personal issues and devotions.
But this is one instance where I feel a direct appeal for prayer is justified, and so I have a special, urgent prayer intention that I would like to pass on to Jimmy's readers.
My niece, Allison (16), is in the hospital right now awaiting a heart transplant. We had prayed that her heart could be repaired, but it is not keeping up with the demands of her body. She has been growing weaker and now weighs less than my 11-year-old daughter.
Please pray that she and her parents will be comforted by the Holy Spirit, that they will find an appropriate donor heart at the right time, that God will guide the hands of the surgeons, and that she will make a complete recovery soon after the surgery. Pray also that they will have the financial help they need, not only for the medical bills, but to help make up for a great deal of missed work.
Please pray also for the soul of the heart donor, whoever that may be.
I think it would be especially appropriate to offer your prayers through the intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary. In addition, given that this is St. Valentine's Day, and hearts are everywhere, you might also ask his help for Allison's heart. And, okay, since this is a big day for flowers, you might put in a prayer to St. Therese!
For those of you who would like more information or who might like to contribute financially, I will be happy to pass on your messages to the parents. For the sake of their privacy, I don't want to publish names and locations here.
In addition, I thought it would be appropriate as a fund raiser for Allison to offer reproductions of my painting "Immaculate Heart" (above, 11"x14") on stretched canvas for $100(US), with all profits going to Allison's parents to help pay for her medical care. If you would like to purchase one of these reproductions, you can e-mail me at timjonesart@yahoo.com. Just include the name "Allison" in the subject line so I can tell it from the SPAM. I'll then e-mail you a PayPal invoice. Your print will be shipped within ten days.
Thanks everyone! Your prayers mean more to me and my family today than any chocolate or flowers.
UPDATE: Allison's family have given the OK to publish her name and contact information. Cards with good wishes can be sent to Allison Jones, Room 309B, The Children’s Hospital, 1056 E. 19th, Denver, CO, 80218
Thanks again, and God bless you all.
Posted by Tim Jones in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (15)
Job Assistance For A Former Priest
(Jimmy Akin)
A reader writes:
I live in Philadelphia, where I left the presbyterate a few years ago....
I am currently employed but am not making enough money to survive. I feel like I am at a dead end.
Is their a former priest's network support group that can help find former priest's find employment? Or would you happen to know someone who could help me?
Please advise.
I don't know of such an organization--or one that is faithful to the Church, anyway--but my knowledge on such matters is very limited, but perhaps readers can help with suggestsions in the combox. I'll make sure that the person who wrote gets the suggestions that come up.
The reader who wrote is to be commended for trying to find help without resorting to some of the illegitimate ways that former priests can try to make money (e.g., serving as a "rent-a-priest" and selling sacraments--or claimed sacraments [several would be invalid without proper faculties]--for money).
Incidentally, I know that I've got some cantankerous readers who are concerned about the number of departures from the priesthood, but this combox is not the place for finding fault or discussing those issues. We don't know what may have led to the gentleman's departure from the priesthood, and there can be perfectly legitimate reasons for doing so, just as there can be perfectly legitimate reasons for ending a marriage.
As it is, the reader is in a tough spot, and he's sincerely reaching out for help and asking for ideas. Let's do the Christian think and try to help, following the example that St. James tells us is set by God himself:
"If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives to all men generously and without reproaching, and it will be given him" (James 1:5).
If that's how God gives information to those who need it, let's make sure we follow his example.
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Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (78)
February 08, 2007
Undying Love
(Jimmy Akin)
You've gotta admire 'em!
The picture to the left depicts the skeletons of a pair of lovers who died 5,000 years ago (3,000 B.C.) in Mantua, Italy.
Their tenderness is obvious.
This couple wasn't buried in a volcanic explosion like that of Pompeii (which happend in the 1st century A.D.). It seems that the man (left) was killed or mortally wounded first and the woman (right) lay down beside him, knowing that she would be killed as well.
Sad!
But a tribute to human love.
I find archaeologists saying how "excited" they are by this find a little morbid.
I'd suggest, instead, praying for their souls.
Lovers like that deserve that much.
GET THE STORY.
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (66)
February 06, 2007
Hangin' Around
(Jimmy Akin)
Square dancing is a very social and sociable activity that has lots of politeness rituals associated with it.
For example, at the beginning of the evening, it's customary for all the dancers to greet each other with handshakes and hugs. Then, at the beginning of a tip (that's a pair of two individual dances; typically a hoedown or "patter" call, followed by a singing call--and BTW, square dancing is where we get the word "hoedown") it's customary for all the men in a square to greet everyone in the square. Then at the end of a tip everyone applauds. Then, after applauding, everyone in the square individually thanks everyone else in the square for dancing with them. And at the end of the evening everyone gives the caller a big round of synchronized applause and a "Thank you!" and then shakes his hand.
All this greeting and thanking means that it's very useful for square dancers to wear name tags--particularly when you have dances where people from more than one club are present.
And so clubs typically have name badges. They usually have the dancer's name, the club's name and logo, and they are often given to a dancer at the time he graduates from a mainstream square dance class and is formally invited to join the club. (Till then, student dancers are typically given informal stick-on or pin-on name tags that have their name written in magic marker.)
Over time, name tags tend to get embellished in various ways. For example, it's common for dancers to drill holes in the bottom of their name tags and then attach small, little dangly things to them. These dangly things are known, appropriately, as "dangles."
Some dangles are given on particular occasions. For example, if you attend a particular club's anniversary dance, you might be given a dangle that commemorates the event. Or, if you visit a distant square dance club while travelling, you might be given a travel badge commemorating your visit (not all of these are dangles, though; some are pin-ons).
Some dangles don't commemorate anything special and are just for fun. These are appropriately known as "fun dangles," and you can typically buy them at big square dance events. They often have cute sayings or pictures on them.
Some dangles take the form of bars that stretch across the width of the dancer's name tag. These are often used to indicate what office a dancer holds or used to hold.
I keep my name tag pinned to the front of my vest, so I don't forget to wear it when I go dancing (transferring it from one shirt to another would be a sure recipe for me to forget), but I haven't had any dangles up to now (in part because I don't have a drill with which to attach anything to my name tag). I haven't even received travel badges when I've visited other clubs travelling.
But at last Friday's dance I was given my first one.
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (22)
Help With The Dark Side
(Jimmy Akin)
A reader writes:
Before I came to Christ (and the Church) I was thirteen years old. One time, I played a fortune-telling game, and the dark side made some dire predictions about my life. Only bad things: Never getting married, never graduating college, dying at age 27, etc...
I heard of other people quija boards, and all the predictions always come true. I'm am very scared. Do you know of any cases when occultic predictions failed to come true?
Yes. False occultic predictions aren't just a dime a dozen, they're a dim a billion. The failure rates for psychics and such are staggeringly high, at least when their predictions have any degree of specificity to them, like the ones allegedly made about you.
Back when I was a teenager, before I was a Christian, I also had an interest in the occult. I didn't get into ouija boards, but I read a lot of books about psychics like Edgar Cayce and Jeanne Dixon, both of whom made numerous predictions that failed to come true.
An example would be a series of cataclysmic "earth changes" that Cayce and other psychics said would occur between 1958 and 1998, including the earth's poles flipping, California and most of Japan sliding into the sea, the rising of the continent of Atlantis, and it was all building ujp to the second coming of Christ and the dawning of the Millennium.
Well, as time rolled along, these things started not happening, and the psychics started to get nervous as we got closer to 1998. Some predicted that the things would happen in 1999, 2000, or 2001 instead.
Needless to say, they didn't, and today this body of predictions--which was hot stuff in prior decades and the subject of numerous books--has been embarassedly swept under the collective rug of the psychic community, with very little being said about it today.
I don't know who's been telling you that predictions of ouija boards are never wrong, but they're just telling you a scare story. They're most likely remembering a few predictions that happened--due to pure random chance--to come true and they're forgetting all the false ones (a phenomenon known as the "file-drawer effect," where things that tend to confirm a theory get remembered and things that tend to disconfirm it get overlooked).
The bottom line is that if ouija boards were infallible then no force on earth would stop people from using them constantly to corner the market and make tons of money. They'd also put all the other psychics out of business, and ouijaboardology would be a respected science being studied and taught at countless universities, with massive funding by private foundations.
That ain't the world we live in, so ouija boards ain't infallible. FAR from it.
So set your mind at rest about that.
Also, since you've now come to Christ and the Church, you have their protection in a way that you didn't before, so draw confidence from that as well.
And know that this is a problem that will dissipate with time. As soon as you get married, graduate college, or turn 28, you'll have your own personal disconfirmation of the predictions.
NOTE: To further help our friend out, I invite readers to mention psychic/occult predictions (particularly ones involving ouija boards) that they are aware of that have proven false!
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Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (52)
January 29, 2007
H & R Block's Dehumanizing Upsell
(Jimmy Akin)
While I was doing my Monday blog posts on Saturday morning, I got a message on my voicemail that started like this:
Hello, this is <NAME> with H & R Block. We did your taxes last year at our <LOCATION> office, and I was calling to set up an appointment.
Now, not everyone may see it this way, but this kind of thing really rubs me the wrong way. It's a sales technique that involves a dehumanizing form of upselling. Upselling is a sales technique whereby the salesman offers the customer goods, services, or options that the customer hasn't requested but might want (e.g., "Do you want fries with that?").
When done in a humane manner, this technique can actually provide the customer with things that they wanted or would have wanted to know about (many people do want fries with their burger), but upselling can also be done in a dehumanizing manner that treats the customer like an object to be exploited (e.g., making your first question to the customer "Do you want our Bacon Cheddar Jack Number One Extra Special Value Meal?"--which is just trying to push something on the customer before he can tell you what he really does want).
H & R Block's phone message to me is a dehumanizing form of upselling. It's upselling because it's offering me a service that I haven't requested (they called me; I didn't call them), and it's dehumanizing because of the assumption that I'm even going to use them again this year.
Maybe I had such a bad experience with them last year that I want to go somewhere else. Maybe one of their competitors is offering a service that I find more attractive. Maybe I recently noted a tax preparer whose office is more conveniently located for me. Maybe I'm one of the millions who's bought TurboTax. Or maybe I've simply decided to do my taxes the old fashioned way with pen and paper.
There are a lot of options out there for people to get their taxes done.
Yet because I happened to use H & R Block as my tax preparer last year, they feel entitled to phone me up out of the blue on a Saturday morning and tell me that they're calling to schedule an appointment.
I, apparently, have no choice in the matter. It's a given that they will do my taxes, and they have determined that the time has come for me to make an appointment.
That's why this is dehumanizing.
It doesn't respect the free will of the customer. It treats him as an object to be exploited.
The way to respect the customer would be to say
Hello, I'm <NAME> with H & R Block, and we did your taxes last year at our <LOCATION> office. We'd really like to do your taxes again this year, and I was wondering if you'd like to set up an appointment.
How hard would it be to say that?
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (81)
January 17, 2007
This Kind of Thing Tears My Heart Out
(Jimmy Akin)
Let's pray for her, and for all in similar conditions (I know it's an unusual situation, but we're on a big planet, and with six billion people, some are in situations similar enough to need our prayers.).
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (41)
December 29, 2006
I've Been Devotionally Memed
(Jimmy Akin)
Michael Barber has memed me with a spiritual devotion meme, so here goes:
1. Favorite devotion or prayer to Jesus.
The Chaplet of Divine Mercy.
2. Favorite Marian devotion or prayer.
It's a mix between an individual Hail Mary, the Rosary, and the Memorare. I have different occasions on which I say each of these.
3. Do you wear a scapular or medal?
I have, but not at present.
4. Do you have holy water in your home?
Yes, including a bottle with water from Lourdes.
5. Do you "offer up" your sufferings?
Yes. This is something I often do for various intentions, including in a general way for my own sanctification and for the salvation of souls.
6. Do you observe First Fridays and First Saturdays?
I have not yet explored these devotions.
7. Do you go to Eucharistic Adoration? How Frequently?
Yes, though the frequency varies.
8. Are you a Saturday evening Mass person or a Sunday morning Mass person?
Neither. I don't have a set Mass time on weekends. I normally go either late Sunday morning or early Sunday afternoon. (I like to sleep in after square dancing Saturday night.) If there's a special reason, I sometimes go to Saturday evening Mass (before dancing).
9. Do you say prayers at mealtime?
Yes, though as part of my diet, I don't do full-blown meals (makes you too hungry and puts you at risk of eating more than you mean to). Instead, I snack, trying to eat the minimum needed to satisfy hunger at the moment (followed by fiber). Because I don't have a formal meal time, I may forget to pray, so what I do is say "Lord, bless this, and all I eat and drink," including the last part to cover those times I forget. When eating with others, of course, I do the "Bless us, O Lord."
10. Favorite saints.
Mary, Paul, Peter, Luke, Justin Martyr, Augustine, Jerome, Patrick, Thomas Aquinas, Thomas More, Gianna Molla.
11. Can you recite the Apostles' Creed by heart?
Yes, but I have to fight myself not to get it mixed up with clauses from the Nicene Creed.
12. Do you usually say short prayers (aspirations) during the course of the day?
Yes, very frequently.
13. Bonus Question: When you pass by an automobile accident or other serious mishap, do you say a quick prayer for the folks involved?
Yes. I also pray for the people involved whenever I hear a siren (police car, ambulance, fire engine) going by. I generally say "Lord, please help the people involved, and all in similar situations." The clause "and all in similar situations" is something I often try to add whenever I'm praying for someone who has a special need or is dealing with a special problem.
I don't tag specific people, so in keeping with the Akin Meme Mutation, I hereby meme anybody who wants to be memed.
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (28)
December 07, 2006
Heads Up, Steve! Competition!
(Jimmy Akin)
JA.O has run pictures before of the work of sand-sculptor extraordinaire Steven D. Greydanus.
But he's got competition in the field of religious sand sculpting.
Here's hoping you'll take on a challenge like this one, Steve!
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (12)
December 04, 2006
Who's This?
(Jimmy Akin)
It's obviously of a couple at their wedding, but who?
Hard to guess, ain't it?
Well, here's a clue--a photo taken last month with the grandkids . . .
If that ain't enought, I'll just tell you who it is: It's Janet and Steve Ray.
Today--Monday--is their 30th anniversary.
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, GUYS! MANY HAPPY RETURNS!
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (20)
November 30, 2006
Mere Comments
(Jimmy Akin)
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (131)
November 29, 2006
A Smattering
(Tim Jones)
I haven't posted here at JA.O for a bit, having been busy with "life stuff"... family, art competitions, inner ear gremlins... but thought I would check in and spout off on a few things just because I can;
The Mid Term Elections - This reminds me of an exchange I saw on an episode of the Andy Griffith Show; Founders Day is coming up and someone asks "Who's going to be Potato Queen this year?" and Andy answers something to the effect of "Well, I don't know... who's turn is it?". It's now the Democrats' turn. I just wish we had more than two girls from which to choose our Potato Queen.
Ojay's Book - Does this whole thing sort of disprove the idea that protests don't work and only serve to give the protestee free publicity? People hollered and complained and the thing got torpedoed - sounds good to me. Now we need to get that nasty black book out of Wal-Mart.
Playstation Craziness - Can't they find a better way to do this? Isn't it a bit ironic to crush and pummel others for the chance to buy a Tickle Me Elmo? How about this... the store hands out lottery tickets (one per customer, checked against a database) in the weeks leading up to the release of the game. On that day they hold a raffle in the parking lot and call out the names of the winners. They then invite everyone inside for free hot cocoa or - for you city folk - a latte. This ought to make everyone happy and avoid the frightening crowd scenes reminiscent of a European soccer match. Unless, you know, people are just that nuts for hot cocoa.
B16 in Turkey - Now here's a man's man... into the teeth of the storm. Please join me in praying a Rosary for his safety and that he will be powerfully used by Christ on this trip.
The Portrait (above) - Warning: Shameless Self Promotion - Why did I post this? Only because it is my latest portrait (still wet) and because my portrait prices are RIDICULOUSLY LOW right now. So low that I am loath to advertise them publicly (I have my reputation to think about). I am also offering my regular still-life pieces at a mere fraction of the website price for readers of JA.O. Just mention that you saw this on Jimmy's blog. See, I am keen to make some extra money to get the missus a nice anniversary bauble. 25 years and not so much as a stray smooch. She really deserves something special for putting up with me... you have no idea...
Visit my WEBSITE, or e-mail me at timjonesart@yahoo.com
Posted by Tim Jones in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (12)
November 21, 2006
Not The Solution I Expected
(Jimmy Akin)
As long-time readers know, I am an enthusiastic square dancer.
I go dancing several times a week (in addition to keeping up the blog). At my peak, I danced five nights a week, though in a major metropolitan area like San Diego you can go seven nights a week if you want to.
Lately, I've pulled back and have also focused on learning to round dance.
Over the summer, I pulled back to the extent that I didn't regularly go to the club I'm formally a member of--the Alpine Squares--which meets on Friday nights. So I hadn't been there in a while.
But I got a letter telling me about an important club meeting that was coming up on November 17, and I went.
After we were done dancing for the evening (and square dancing is MORE FUN THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE--join your local club AS SOON as they start a new class!), we held the meeting, and it became clear that the principal thing the club needed was to elect a new board that included new blood among the officers.
In most social clubs, people don't want to put themselves forward as potential officers, and so getting new officers is hard.
I would have been willing to serve in any office that the club needed filled, but I was embarrassed to put myself forward since I hadn't been attending regularly of late.
The meeting began, and during it I asked a number of questions that I hoped were helpful.
I was trying to steel my nerve to volunteer for secretary or treasurer, though I was embarrassed to do so.
Then people who had served as officers in the past volunteered for these positions, and I thought, "Well, that's it for me. Those are the only positions I could conceivably volunteer for."
And then a former president of the club turned to me and said, "Jimmy, what I want to know is: Would you be willing to step forward for the office of president?"
I was flabbergasted.
I said I was hesitant to volunteer for anything, given my attendance over the summer, but I like the club and want to do whatever it needs. And maybe I would be a good secretary or treasurer, but I was willing to do whatever the club needed.
So she said, "All in favor of Jimmy being president say 'Aye.'"
And people shouted "Aye!" and raised their hands.
After we talked about it for a bit, I said, "I'm not sure there was a majority," and they shouted "Aye!" all the louder and more people raised their hands.
At the end of the meeting there was a voice vote on the entire slate of candidates, and it passed without opposition.
And then everyone congratulated me and my fellow officers elect.
So now I'm the president elect.
Come January, I will be the new president of Alpine Squares and will do my best to serve the club.
But it's something I was not expecting.
Please pray for me and support your local (INCREDIBLY FUN!) square dance club.
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (32)
November 08, 2006
Stomach In A Bowl
(Jimmy Akin)
When it comes to the culinary arts, presentation is not everything, but it is something.
Kentucky Fried Chicken seems to have forgotten this.
Lately I've been seeing ads for what KFC calls its "Famous Bowls."
That itself is offputting. I always hate it when marketers suddenly proclaim some newly invented product that nobody has ever heard of before "famous." Fame is not something you can simply proclaim right out the gate. It is something that only can be known with the passage of time, and it is a form of dehumanizing marketing that treats consumers as objects rather than subjects to proclaim something "famous" from the very first moment it is released to the public.
Same thing goes for declaring things "hits" or "best-sellers" before they are, in fact, hits or best-sellers. I remember back in 1978, when the original (and ultra-campy) Battlestar Galactica was about to debut and I saw an add in a sci-fi magazine for some product (a toy or something) based on the "hit" TV show Battlestar Galactica--which wasn't a hit at all in that it hadn't even hit the airwaves yet!
Didn't like this kind of deceptive, dehumanizing marketing then, and don't like it now.
I suspect, however, that KFC's "Famous" Bowls may come to be regarded with time as its infamous bowls--and for reasons that have nothing to do with the adjective.
The fact is, the product strikes me as simply disgusting. Basically, they've taken everything they happen to already have on hand at KFC and jammed it all into a bowl. It's like taking everything you might eat at a KFC meal and mixing it all up together (especially onces your spoon, or fork, or spork starts digging into it).
Here's how their web site describes it in an attempt to make it sound appetizing:
We start with a generous serving of our creamy mashed potatoes, layered with sweet corn and loaded with bite-sized pieces of crispy chicken. Then we drizzle it all with our signature home-style gravy and top it off with a shredded three-cheese blend. It's all your favorite flavors coming together.
Seeing the thing doesn't make it seem any more appetizing:
If you see them layering these things together one at a time in a TV ad, it's even more disgusting.
This morning at Catholic Answers, two of my colleagues and I were discussing this, and we were all appalled at the fact KFC would even consider marketing something like this. One of my colleagues referred to it as "a heart attack in a bowl."
(Which is not surprising since sudden, massive jolts of carbohydrates can cause arrhythmias--one of the reasons heart attacks spike after Thanksgiving and Christmas.)
They don't exactly make finding the nutritional information on this monster easy, but if you poke around enough, you can come up with it. Here are the stats:
Calories: 720
Fat: 32 grams (that's half the fat the USDA wants you to have in a day)
Saturated Fat: 9 grams (again, that's half the saturated fat the USDA recommends for a whole day)
Cholesterol: 65 milligrams
Sodium: 2390 milligrams (that's all the salt you're supposed to have for a whole day)
Carbohydrates: 81 grams (it takes me three days to eat that many on my diet)
Protein: 29 grams
SOURCE.
So . . . you wolf one of these things down at lunch and your system gets hit with a massive load of fat, carbohydrates, and salt all at once. Just what your heart and circulatory system needs.
This bad boy is thus high-fat, high-carb, high-salt. It doesn't get much worse than that.
But the most startling thing is not how unhealthy the "Famous" Bowls are. It's the idea that KFC would think that people would actually find this combination appetizing.
Yes, I know that when you eat a meal it all goes to one place and gets mixed up there, but--as I noted at the outset--presentation is an important part of the culinary arts, and this product completely ignores that fact in a lazy attempt to get a new product by simply dumping ingredients they already have on hand into a bowl.
I might not have had a problem (when I was on a high-carb diet) eating deep-fried, breaded chicken and mashed potatoes at the same meal, but I didn't want deep-fried breaded chunks of chicken in my mashed potatoes. Nor do I want gravy on corn or cheese on gravy.
YUCK!
So while what you eat does all go to one place, I have no desire whatsoever to eat a KFC version of "Stomach in a Bowl."
Now, I know what you're thinking: De gustibus non disputandum est, interpreting rhe de gustibus part quite literally in this case.
I'm sure that KFC has done some market research that shows at least some people will like this thing. Some here on the blog may even find it appetizing. But I can't shake the feeling here that we're looking at a potential marketing disaster.
I mean, not one of "New Coke" caliber, but . . . say . . . the kind of product flop that met Ray Kroc when he found his burger sales plummeting in Catholic areas in Lent back in the 1950s and--since he didn't want to allow his McDonalds' restaurants to sell fish sandwiches so that fish would be "stinking up the place," he proposed an alternative and let the customers decide which they preferred.
Which did they prefer?
Let's just say that McDonalds started serving Filet-O-Fish sandwiches.
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (123)
October 12, 2006
Cockroach Eating Contest Bugs PETA
(Jimmy Akin)
It bugs me, too--though I suspect not for the same reason it bugs PETA.
GET THE STORY.
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (23)
July 22, 2006
New Greydanus!
(Jimmy Akin)
Mother and baby both doing fine!
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (36)
July 21, 2006
Prayer Requests
(Jimmy Akin)
I haven't decided how often to have prayer request posts here on the blog (probably not every week as was suggested, but once in a while).
I'd like to begin one today, though, and with a special prayer request of my own: SDG and his wife are expecting a new baby and, since the little one is significantly overdue, they are finally having labor induced today. I'd like to ask folks to pray for the safe delivery of mother and baby.
So that's my prayer intention.
Please use the combox to add your own prayer intentions.
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (45)
Superheroes Go Postal
(Michelle Arnold)
Just in case anyone here at JA.org happens to like superheroes, y'all may be interested to know that your favorite caped crusaders are coming soon to a postage stamp near you.
"Faster than a speeding bullet, comic book superheroes are coming to a post office near you. Batman and Superman, Wonder Woman, Supergirl and a half dozen other superheroes will star on new postage stamps being released Thursday.
"The new 39-cent stamps and 24-cent postal cards will be made public at a comic book show in San Diego, and will go on sale nationwide Friday.
"The stamps are sold in a sheet of 20, half featuring the individual superheroes and half showing covers of comic books starring them.
"The Postal Service reports this is its first set of super hero stamps, indicating more are likely to follow."
The super stamp models are slated to include, among others, Batman, Wonder Woman, The Green Lantern, and Supergirl. No word yet on whether letters posted with the superhero stamps will arrive at their destination faster than a speeding bullet.
Posted by Michelle Arnold in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (13)
July 06, 2006
Medjugorje
(Jimmy Akin)
I normally don't write much about apparitions--particularly ones that have not been either approved by the Church or specifically condemned as incompatible with the faith, but there is currently going around the blogosphere a statement by Bishop Peric of Mostar-Duvno regarding the apparitions reported at Medjugorje, which is in his diocese.
I'm not going to address the question of whether the apparitions reported at Medjugorje are real or not. I haven't yet done the kind of research I would need to in order to satisfy myself on that question. But it's worth noting the way that the topic is presently being handled on the official level.
DIANE OVER AT TE DEUM HAS THE FULL TEXT OF A HOMILY THE BISHOP GAVE ON THE SUBJECT, ALONG WITH HER OWN COMMENTARY.
(CHT to those who e-mailed.)
YOU CAN ALSO READ IT DIRECTLY ON THE DIOCESE OF MOSTAR WEBSITE.
Poking around the Mostar website, I also discovered
THIS BACKGROUNDER AND STATEMENT ON MEDJUGORJE BY THE BISHOP.
NOTE: Both the homily and the backgrounder are translations and so it should not be assumed that everything they say has the same force in the original language as it does in English. Things in the original may be stronger or weaker than they come across in translation.
Here is the nut of what the bishop said in the homily:
The judgements of the bishops, after all the canonical investigations made thus far, can be summarized in these following points:
1 - Medjugorje is a catholic parish in which liturgical and pastoral activities are carried out, just as in all the other parishes of this diocese of Mostar-Duvno. No-one except the official Church authorities is then authorized to attribute the formal title of “shrine” to this place.
2 - On the basis of Church investigations of the events of Medjugorje, it cannot be determined that these events involve supernatural apparitions or revelations. This means that till now the Church has not accepted, neither as supernatural nor as Marian, any of the apparitions.
3 - Priests who canonically administer this parish of Medjugorje or those who come as visitors, are not authorised to express their private views contrary to the official position of the Church on the so-called “apparitions” and “messages”, during celebrations of the sacraments, neither during other common acts of piety, nor in the Catholic media.
4 - The Catholic faithful are not only free from any obligation to believe in the authenticity of the “apparitions” but they must also know that church pilgrimages are not allowed, whether official or private, individual or group, or from other parishes, if they presuppose the authenticity of the “apparitions” or if by undertaking them attempt to certify these “apparitions”.
5 - As the local Bishop, I maintain that regarding the events of Medjugorje, on the basis of the investigations and experience gained thus far, throughout these last 25 years, the Church has not confirmed a single “apparition” as authentically being the Madonna.
He then makes the following dramatic appeal:
Therefore I responsibly call upon those who claim themselves to be “seers”, as well as those persons behind the “messages”, to demonstrate ecclesiastical obedience and to cease with these public manifestations and messages in this parish. In this fashion they shall show their necessary adherence to the Church, by neither placing private “apparitions” nor private sayings before the official position of the Church.
I can't help wondering if that's also tied to something else he said:
The fact that during these 25 years there has been talk of tens of thousands of “apparitions” does not contribute any authenticity to these events, which according to the words of our current Pope, who I encountered during an audience on 24 February this year, commented that at the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith they always questioned how all these “apparitions” could be considered authentic for the Catholic faithful.
This sets off my spider sense a little bit. I'm thinking that there may be a connection between these two events.
In his pontificate, B16 has been quietly (or not so quietly) dealing with issues that appeared to drift during the pontificate of John Paul II. He reined in the Franciscans in Assisi; he reined in the Neocatechumenal Way; he dealt with the Fr. Maciel matter. I'm wondering if the discussion he had with Bishop Peric included an initiative to clarify where the Church is regarding the subject of Medjugorje.
If it didn't then I'd say that Bishop Peric made a big mistake repeating what B16 told him in private. This is a sensitive matter, and if the pope hasn't authorized you to disclose his private views on a matter then it is a big mistake to do so.
He also would be making a mistake to call on the seers to cease their public activities in the parish unless he had reasonable assurances that he would be backed up on this point if he were challenged on it.
I don't have any proof here--I'm just speculating--but I'm wondering if his discussion with B16 didn't involve the subject of a new iniative to more forcefully clarify the Medjugorje situation and seek greater pastoral control over it since, as the bishop reports:
[I]n this local Church of Mostar-Duvno, there exists something similar to a schism. A number of priests that have been expelled from the Franciscan OFM Order by the Generalate of the Order, due to their disobedience to the Holy Father, for years now have been forcefully keeping a few parish churches and rectories along with church inventory. They have not only been illegally active in these parishes, but they have also administered the sacraments profanely, while others invalidly, such as Confession and Confirmation, or they have assisted at invalid marriages. This type of anti-ecclesial behaviour is shocking to all of us. At the same time, this scandal of sacrilegiously administering the sacraments, especially of the Most Holy Body of Christ, must shock all the faithful as well who invalidly confess their sins to these priests and participate in sacrilegious liturgies. We pray to the Lord that this scandal and schism be uprooted as soon as possible from our midst.
If I were B16, that's the kind of situation I would want to get sorted out.
Posted by Jimmy Akin in Miscellaneous | Permalink | Comments (55)
March 08, 2006
Proof!
(Jimmy Akin)
Or at least as much proof as photographs can provide these days! (The "pictures don't lie" being long over.)
Yes, I've told y'all about my regular activities each week square dancing and round dancing, but here are the pictures to prove it!
On Sunday nights I dance with a group known as the Sundown Squares. (In addition to my Tuesday night group, the Valley Twirlers, and my Friday night group, the Alpine Squares--beside random pickup dances on other nights.)
Recently the Sundown Squares had a party night, complete with volunteer photographers, and they captured these images.
First, here's a picture of me with my round dance class:
That's me in the middle of the back row. Our teachers are the man and woman on the far right. And the ladies in the middle of the front line are really, really small. (Makes them extra cute, don't you think?)
For those who may not know, round dance is the same thing as ballroom dancing, except that there's a "cuer" who cues the moves that you're supposed to make, so that you don't have to have a dance memorized in order to do it. As long as you know the moves, you can do any dance the cuer puts on the turntable (or CD player, or iPod, or computer). The presence of a cuer lets you do many more dances than you could in traditional ballroom dancing, making it much more diverse and fun.
After my round dance class is finished, I switch to square dancing with the Sundown Squares, and here's a picture of that:
In this picture, I and my fellow dancers are in lines, doing an "eight-to-the-middle-and-back" move.
You may notice in these pictures that many of the other dancers are older than I am. Partly that's because of the particular composition of the Sundown Squares, and partly it's because most young folks today are glued to their iPods and are too lazy for real dancing. I'm far from the youngest member of the group, though, and there are some who aren't even in their teens yet.
But who cares about age?! It's all about fun!
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February 08, 2006
Oklahoma! Choreography
(Jimmy Akin)
Down yonder a reader (Emily S of O Beauty Unattempted) writes:
Thanks so much for the link! When first you mentioned it, being of a dancerly nature myself, I thought "Oh, how hard can it really be?" Phew! But now I can hardly wait to have an opportunity to try out those moves (Oklahoma choreography, here I come!). Just one question - do they generally require any sort of hand/arm hold or no? (The ones you mentioned. Esp. when circling a partner.)
Glad to hear you're interested! Yes, there are specific hand and arm holds that are required in these moves. Sometimes more than one hold is used in each move.
In Spin Chain And Exchange The Gears, for example, the dancers who are about to trade places put their hands palm-forward (NOT grabbing) at approximately shoulder height and then use this as the pivot point around which they trade. At a certain point in the move, though, you have groups of four dancers putting their hands together (again at approximately shoulder height, NOT grabbing) to create what is known as a star formation, which then rotates around the four hands as a pivot point.
There are other hand holds in these moves, too, so it gets rather complicated.
If you're wanting to use square dancing as part of a production of Oklahoma! (if I understood your meaning correctly) then the simplest thing to do is bring in an actual square dance group (including the caller) as a bunch of extras.
If that isn't feasible (e.g., because you're wanting to do a high school production of the musical with only students as actors) then the thing to do would be to bring in a caller to teach the students just enough square dance moves to do the choreography you want. (You won't have time to train them in all square dance moves.)
I'd probably recommend having most of it be simple, ordinary stuff that won't be hard for the students, with maybe one or two really complex moves as a show-stopper for the audience.
I'd also recommend checking out some actual square dance groups in your area first to get a sense of what is possible and how it looks from a horizontal (audience) perspective.
Incidentally, there's one nice advantage to square dancing compared to almost other forms of dance: It really doesn't matter that much what you're doing with your feet. Square dancing is about your position on the floor and what you're doing with your arms, not specifically what you're doing with your feet as you navigate the floor. (It helps to step to the beat, but this is not required. As long as you get where you're supposed to be, that's enough.)
With square dancing there's no careful, elegant stepping of the kind that ballroom or round dancing (or tap, for that matter) requires, so this is one thing that students or actors won't have to worry about.
Square dancing, especially when done fast, is about having fun rather than being elegant--a fact that has become obvious to me now that I'm also taking round dancing classes. As I'm in the round dance class trying to do all kind of elegantly timed steps, I can hear the square dance class in the next room tearing up the floor and having fun without worrying about being graceful and elegant.
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February 06, 2006
YEE-HAW!!!
(Jimmy Akin)
I had quite an accomplishment Friday night.
Here's the story: A couple of years ago I went through a square dance class and made it through graduation, but work-related travel and other things made my attendance toward the end spotty. As a result, although I learned the moves at end of the program, I didn't learn them well and did not feel comfortable going to ordinary dances.
I planned to start the class over the next fall, but didn't know when the class was starting and missed it.
So this year I ran across a handbill at a western wear store saying when a class was starting and went.
In fact, I started attending several different clubs.
Many of the moves were familiar, of course, and for others my dim memories of them quickly began to reawaken, and soon I was able to dance along with the club (not just the class) at a couple of these groups.
But I couldn't do that at one of them.
Y'see, different clubs have different preferences about how easy or challenging they like it when they dance.
The Friday night group has the toughest caller in the county (at least as far as I am aware). He's a really good teacher, but for club dances he does the most challenging calling of anybody around these here parts. By that I mean that he calls the dance faster, uses more the more complex moves more often, and uses impromptu variants a lot. You really have to be good in order to dance in a club session that he calls.
As a result, after starting back to square dancing, it took the longest for my skills to get back to where they needed to be if I were to dance with the Friday night club.
I mean, there was no way that I'd be able to do the fearsome Load The Boat or the dreaded Teacup Chain or the sanity-shattering Relay The Deucey or the soul-destroying Spin Chain And Exchange The Gears.
Not without some review and practice.
I mean, compared to those moves of elder madness things like Dixie Style To An Ocean Wave are nothing.
But Friday night I made the breakthrough!
With the encouragement of some of the club members, I stayed after the class period and danced with the club.
I was able to keep up with the other dancers, even at the
high-challenge level that this club and caller enjoy. I even got
through Relay The Deucey and Spin Chain And Exchange The Gears.
I danced every single tip except for the first. (A tip is a unit of two dances, typically a patter call followed by a singing call.)
This means that, between the class and the club, I danced for THREE HOURS Friday night, and on Saturday I had the muscle strains and aches all over my body to prove it.
My dancing ability at this level is still shaky, but I expect that within a couple of months I'll have it smoothed out, especially with the amount of practice I'm getting these days.
I also imagine that my body will adjust fairly quickly to the level of activity I'm putting it through in these dances.
Friday night isn't even the longest dance night I'm doing.
At my Sunday night group I'm doing a two hour class of round dancing, followed by a two hour club of square dancing, for a total of FOUR hours.
Body aches are normal on Monday at this point.
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January 09, 2006
Searching For A Capuchin
(Jimmy Akin)
No, not a member of the Capuchin religious order. . . . a capuchin monkey.
A reader writes:
this e-mail probably will be shocking to you but God knows i gotta try..my lil capuchin just passed away nov 11th and god knows i hated him passing...
i am looking for another baby but now my finances is limited yet my caring for one is not limited..my vet took care of charlie all his lil life
i am looking for one of any age or sex will drive anywhere, anytime do you possibly know of any that's in need of an excellent home?
i would do absolutely anything to achieve this.my baby went everywhere i went he slept with me and ate with me i have very good references from my vet................
thank you for reading my mail..God bless you and again thank you for reading my mail and hopefully God will provide a way for me on my quest...
I'm afraid that I don't know where there are any capuchin monkeys available for adoption inexpensively, but I'll be happy to do what I can to help.
First, HERE'S A LINK TO A PLACE WHERE YOU CAN CONTACT BREEDERS WHO MAY HAVE WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR.
The disadvantage of going this route is that the ones you could obtain from these sources are likely to be quite expensive, and you say that your finances are limited at present. Perhaps you might be able to start saving up and looking for ways to make extra money, though.
In the meantime,
HERE'S A PLACE WHERE YOU CAN PUT FREE CLASSIFIED ADS ONLINE FOR EXOTIC PETS.
I checked the listings, and some people are asking for capuchin monkeys, so if you get your ad in there, maybe someone who needs to find a home for a capuchin will find it!
Also, I'd ask that if other readers have good leads on where the reader might be able to find a capuchin in need of adoption to either use the combox or e-mail me (I have additional contact information for the reader that is not included in the above).
Thanks, and good luck!
NOTE FOR THOSE NOT FAMILIAR WITH CAPUCHIN MONKEYS: They're very intelligent creatures that can even be taught how economics works.
I'm not kidding.
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January 05, 2006
Media Note
(Jimmy Akin)
Just a note to let folks know that I'm scheduled to appear on the Drew Mariani Show this afternoon to talk about the Brokeback Mountain fiasco.
I'm scheduled to be on at 5:30 Eastern, 2:30 Pacific.
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December 31, 2005
Happy Leap Second!
(Jimmy Akin)
Some person in authority--I don't know who, very likely the astronomer royal--has decided that although for such a beastly month as February twenty-eight days as a rule are plenty, one year in every four his days shall be reckoned as nine and twenty.
That's what we call "Leap Year"--when we get an extra day in the year (making it kind of a misnomer--and yes, I know that it wasn't the astronomer royal who decided this).
This year, though, we get a leap second.
At 7 p.m. EST (4 p.m. PST), we'll have an extra second inserted to account for the fact that the earth is slowing down its rotation (but ever so slowly, so we don't notice).
Have fun with your extra second!
Be sure to party like it's 1999!
GET THE STORY (WHICH WILL TAKE YOU LONGER THAN A SECOND TO READ).
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December 19, 2005
A Christmas Invitation
(Jimmy Akin)
Just before Thanksgiving, I suggested that if folks have benefitted from my blog that they consider volunteering for, donating to, or otherwise helping holiday relief programs at their local parishes or churches.
We're now a little bit out from Christmas, and I'd like to renew my suggestion: If you feel that you have benefitted from the blog, and if you have the ability to do so, please consider doing something for the less fortunate this year for Christmas (or even afterwards if there's not enough time).
Please constant your local parish, church, soup kitchen, homeless shelter, nursing home, or what have you, and do something for those who need help this Christmas. There are more of them than you know, and you can help make a real difference for them this year.
Whether you're young or old, Christian or not, you can be a help and can an instrument of God's love at a time when many are hurting.
There is nothing more bitter than feeling alone and afraid at Christmas.
Help show them Our Savior's love on the feast of his Birth.
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December 06, 2005
Music Composition Bleg
(Jimmy Akin)
I've got an idea.
But I can't tell you what it is yet. (And no, it's not one of the three secrets. It's a NEW one.)
What I can tell you is that it involves music. (And no, it's not writing new music for Mass. It's for something else.)
Unfortunately, my music composition skills are quite limited--as are my performance skills.
So I need someone to help me.
I am therefore wondering if anyone can point me toward a music composition service that accepts work-made-for-hire orders and that isn't overly hugely expensive. (The work-made-for-hire aspect is important as this is a project that would be for the service of the Church and so I need to keep ahold of the rights to the music.)
I'm looking to get a number of very short tunes written and performed and recorded. I don't care too much about the instrument (piano, guitar, keyboards, etc.) as that's not what is important for the project I have in mind.
The melodies themselves would need to be catchy--like jingles--but would not need to have amazing artistic qualities or orchestrations beyond that.
I can even supply prototypes for these melodies, so they may not need more than touching up and performance.
Something close to chants would also work for these.
Can anyone point me in the right direction on this kind of thing?
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December 04, 2005
California After Mass Today
(Jimmy Akin)
(Click to enlarge.)
Be envious, everybody.
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December 02, 2005
Round Dancing
(Jimmy Akin)
Y'all know that I go square dancing, but this week I also went round dancing.
No really!
There is such a thing as round dance. The defining difference (though not the only difference) being that the couple aren't arranged in a square but a ring (hence: "round").
I also went contra dancing, which despite its name is not a form of protest against the concept of dance but is itself a type of dance.
Lemme 'splain:
In order for people to do square dancing, you (normally) need groups of eight people, consisting of four men and four women. These four couples form a square.
If you have eight people of the right genders, you can form one square. If you have sixteen people of the right genders you can do two squares. Twenty-four people of the right genders and you can do three squares, and so on.
But what if you don't have the right number and mix of people?
If you've got less than you need for a single square then nobody gets to square dance.
If you've got between the number you need for a square and an additional square then some people will have to sit out and not dance.
Or you can get creative.
I've been in a situation where we had six couples, which was not the eight couples needed for two squares, and so the caller put us in a rectangle and we did a kind of "rectangle dance" using a subset of the square dance calls (since not all calls designed for a square will work with a rectangle).
There are other ways of getting creative, too. F'rinstance: Doing different forms of dance that are related to square dance. That's where contra and round dancing come in.
Square dance evolved out of the same mix of dance types as English country dance, Morris dancing, quadrilles, and contra dance, so it uses many of the same moves.
This week when I showed up for square dancing, we didn't have enough people for a whole square. We only had three couples--not the four you need for a full square--so instead the caller taught us a contra dance.
Contra dancing consists of couples in lines (meaning that, yes, it is a form of line dance), and since we had three couples we could do a dance with two lines of three persons each.
If you've seen Gone with the Wind, you've seen contra dancing. In one scene, Scarlett and Rhett participate in the Virginia Reel--a famous contra dance (also classified as an English country dance).
This week the caller didn't teach us the Virginia Reel (though that would have been fun), b